Teaching and learning

*Argh*....damn tired today...woke up 7 in the morning, the weather was so nice to sleep, cloudy and cold. But it started to rain cats and dogs when i brushed my teeth. What to do? Brought an umbrella out lo, then had a heavy breakfast with some politicians. Quite bored to hear their "stories"....>_<

Reached the office at 9, but the current HR ex hadn't come wor...so i just sat in front of the computer and went through some documents on the table sambil wait him. He reached around 10 then he showed me the site's attendance lists and asked me to do it and he just goyang kaki beside me...then walked in and out of the room...chitchating with the operational manager beside my room, answering mysterious calls ( cause he kept on hiding himself in his boss room to answer his ph), writing something behind the PC monitor mysteriously, covered it like i would steal anything from him! He just seemed like very very busy!!! BUsy with his own personal things! Then oklo, i just updated the employees' salary lists and even do the schedule for toilet washing ( Believe me or not!!! we need to take turn to clean the toilet!!)

12 o'clock sharp, they were all having lunch break, as i was not hungry so i stayed there and thougt that maybe later i can back like 2pm. I did the filling job the whole 1 and 1/2 hrs break. Time's up! it was 1.30 but he had not appear in the office. He came around 2.15!! He said he had his nap at home just now!! Nvm, i quickily asked him about the payroll stuffs that i stuck b4 lunch break. Finally done for 1 site (there are all together 7 or 8 sites).

3 o'clock, he said he want to out a while. Then i told him i wanna back at 3. He then passed me a Perkeso form and said why don't u go and settle it since u'll soon becoming HR.....then his ph rang again...He went to his boss's room. Again!

Then i just packed my things then told the operational manager beside my room that i'm leaving.

Hate la, i want to learn but he couldn't teach me...waste my time at there!

Am quite angry before i left....
but now...
haiz...forget about it la!
Am tired...

I went to meet Susanna, Sara and Song Fei to night.
Well, nothing much to talk about,
just asking about our friends' news.
And i'm quite surprise cause one of my course mate get married... Wow~
Most of my friends are still jobless, but a few of them will start to work next month.
God bless ya!

We finished almost 10pm then i moved on to meet my SUPP's friends near their Centre.
It has been so long didn't meet with them.
They forced me to have a small plate of Mihoon and bought me some drinks.
It was so annoying cause lots of mosquitoes were biting me!!!(i wore short pant)
Stupid mosquitoes!!

when we were ready to go back, i stopped Lee and asked him about S's grave.
He told me a lot of things just wanted to stop me from going to his grave.
He told about his gf, his sis, his mom
and asked me what was the reason i wanted to go there?
What was in my mind for going to that place?
What was my status to go there?
You sure it's gonna change anything after you go there? Getting better or getting worse?

He just told me a lot of things...

At the end he seriously told me " Ping2, you don't have to go, just go on with your life and let the time to cure everything, don't let that memory bug you for the rest of your life!"

Friday

This is the report that i got back today... The doctor said i'm so lucky cause my immune system (Hepatitis) was so damn strong! It's over 100..Thank God! Thought i need to spend another RM45 to get the antibody injection. Huha..


My 3 years ago's report. It shows non-immuned at all!! And that time i only went for 1 dose of injection before going to UNIMAS. Doctor said should need to have 3 doses...But look at the report above ^_^


Attended STMS graduation at Wesley Church Sibu. I'm so proud of you nana...Remember what u had promised. Apply all the knowledge in your life! no matter where are you!! And don't cry again ya...


Gifts from my fellowship group in Xin Fu Yuan Tan. Another step closer to God! Actually still got keychain, bag, sticker and some bookmarks...just i am lazy to go and take it...



The Purpose Driven Life by Rick Warren. They said is a nice book and it only costs RM6 !!! Is not a thin book, it has 315 pages not including cover! Hehe...after kissing dating goodbye then is u turn ^_^

A story from my mailbox

The only survivor of a shipwreck was washed up on a small, uninhabited island. He prayed feverishly for God to rescue him, and every day he scanned the horizon for help, but none seemed forthcoming. Exhausted, he eventually managed to build a little hut out of driftwood to protect him from the elements, and to store his few possessions. But then one day, after scavenging for food, he arrived home to find his little hut in flames, the smoke rolling up to the sky. The worst had happened; everything was lost. He was stunned with grief and anger.
"God, how could you do this to me!" he cried.

Early the next day, however, he was awakened by the sound of a ship that was approaching the island. It had come to rescue him.
"How did you know I was here?" asked the weary man of his rescuers.
"We saw your smoke signal," they replied.

It is easy to get discouraged when things are going bad. But we shouldn't lose heart, because God is at work in our lives, even in the midst of pain and suffering. Remember, next time your little hut is burning to the ground it just may be a smoke signal that summons the grace of God. For all the negative things we have to say to ourselves, God has a positive answer!

You say: "I'm too tired"
God says: I will give you rest (Matthew 11:28-30)

You say: "Nobody really loves me"
God says: I love you (John 3:16 & John 3:34)

You say: "I can't go on"
God says: My grace is sufficient (II Corinthians 12:9 & Psalm 91:15)

You say: "I can't figure things out"
God says: I will direct your steps (Proverbs 3:5-6)

You say: "I can't do it"
God says: You can do all things (Philippians 4:13)

You say: "I'm not able"
God says: I am able (II Corinthians 9:8)

You say: "It's not worth it"
God says: It will be worth it (Roman 8:28)

You say: "I can't forgive myself"
God says: I Forgive you (I John 1:9 & Romans 8:1)

You say: "I'm poor"
God says: I will supply all your needs (Philippians 4:19)

You say: "I'm afraid"
God says: I have not given you a spirit of fear (II Timothy 1:7)

You say: "I'm always worried and frustrated"
God says: Cast all your cares on ME (I Peter 5:7)

Dear...

I stopped myself to think of any possibility that we might be together. I'm afraid to face the fate that 1 day we may be apart. So i always psycho myself not to think of you, cause u might not be the right 1. I know u must be blur and think that gals are so troublesome! Today say this and this but just in a second turn to the other way round!

Yes, sometimes i do find myself a little bit of "not honest to myself"! I always try to hide those bad feelings underneath my heart hoping that i'll forget it one day. It doesn't works. It's not the way to solve it. I knew it! But i just can't find a better solution for it! That's why i can't tell you some of the things cause i myself don't even know what i really want!! How am i gonna tell you then??

I was trying not to do the same mistakes again like what i had done to Stanley. Checking his ph's records, reading his messages, jealous with the gals who are so close with him, do all these like i'm a crazy and desperate housewife waiting for my deceitful husband to come back to my side! What a stupid and silly gal!!! And i don't want to have that kinda feeling again from another guy. I'm sick of all that sucks feeling! So i chose to not to involve in any of your activities, don't want to ask where have u been, who u with, who u are calling or messaging with, or why u din message me, why u din reply me.......i would rather don't want to know it. I'm sorry. I'm not manja u, i just don't want to repeat the same story again. Same scene, same fight, same harsh words...

All these thought came out from the new that Shirley will gonna move in to your house and share her life with you soon.

See, am not as good as what u think. The real me is so evil

feel like i am an alien at home!
feel like am living in my own world, not with them.
the way they think, they act and they talk sometime really shocked me!

Will get used to it soon, i think.

Mom easily get angry. Same goes to my dad.
want to run away from them.

Better just locked myself in my room.

給在為夢想努力奮鬥的你

心若改變，你的態度跟著改變；
態度改變，你的習慣跟著改變；
習慣改變，你的性格跟著改變；
性格改變，你的人生跟著改變。

提醒我們在努力追求夢想的同時，
千萬不要忘了最初的本心。

things that out of control

I was trying no to let myself to have those negative thinking in my mind! That makes me blue all day long. I’m still loss. Even though I prayed every day. I told myself don’t worry about tomorrow, God will plan for me. But still Satan is working inside me!

Job.

I have no idea which companies should I apply, or there is none I can apply! Now only waiting the call from KTS. How if they reject me and no any others companies call me? wo bu zhi dao...Government sector? Parents and friends kept on persuading me to apply for teacher. I dun like it. Really really don’t like it!... Bank? What post should I apply? Most of them are seeking marketing executive. Does it means that I need to switch my field? wo bu zhi dao again! -.-

Exercise.

I wanna go for a jog! But no place for me to jog! Housing area here? Imaging when u jog, there will be motorcycles and cars approach you and people inside would keep on saying “ hello ah mui”…..and that really killed my mood to jog! Swimming? Think should b the same. Huge difference between guy and gal huh! If I were a boy, sure I wouldn’t face this kinda problem! Am I right? Okay, maybe sometime got some gays will approach you, according to my friend’s experience.

Jogging used to be one of the best way for me to release stress and relax my mind…

Family.

I am still not used to be at home. Especially I will be home for quite a long time. The way they communicate, they way they treat us…I can do nothing cause they are my parent. And in that situation, I would not tell them any single thing about me! So I would then try to call my friend. But is hard to share all ur personal thing with just any of your friends. The one that I would like to talk to was not free, the one that I shouldn’t call, they were so free and so willing to answer ur call and listen to all ur rubbish complain!

Relationship.

What a mess! I was trying to find a way to solve my complicated relationship. So I read a book named “I kiss dating goodbye”. God’s way of love is totally different from what I think or what I do! If I were to follow the book, am sure singleness is my destiny. It’s hard to find a guy that would like to follow principle that “the joy of intimacy is the reward of commitment” (easy to say than do !)

-.-